The idea for this diary came from observing the diaries and sketchbooks of artists displayed in museums and galleries after their death. I realised that I wanted to share my stories and thoughts while I'm still alive. As a child, I used to write diaries, but my mother had a penchant for finding and reading them. This invasion of privacy instilled a fear in me, making me reluctant to write or share my thoughts with others. For me, this diary represents a confrontation with those fears—a step toward befriending them. It symbolises acceptance and forgiveness. This diary is deeply personal, and through it, I aim to bring my narrative to life.
In this diary, I will weave my story through both visuals and words. I’ll share my thoughts, wishes, desires, and ideas—everything. These entries might not always be right or good, but they will always be honest. My goal is to leave behind a story that I can revisit in my old age, re-reading and reliving the moments that shaped me. I hope others can find resonance in my experiences as well.
Today marks the beginning of my diary because it is the anniversary of when I minted my first artwork three years ago. Though my journey in this space began a few months earlier, this milestone represents a turning point in my life. The changes have been profound, and I am infinitely grateful to everyone who has accompanied me on this journey.
This space has been a tremendous teacher, and I am still learning and loving every moment. I've encountered a range of experiences—good and bad, happy and sad—and I value each one. Through this journey, I am learning to accept myself, embracing both my strengths and my shadows. I am befriending my fears, navigating difficulties, cultivating empathy, and appreciating every moment, regardless of its nature.
At various stages of our lives, we encounter changes and tipping points. Sometimes these shifts are dramatic, other times subtle. Consciously or unconsciously, we create these moments, much like we create everything else in our lives. Tipping points are essential for our growth, pushing us to a higher level, making us stronger and better. These moments can be seen as the culmination of accumulated experiences, thoughts, and emotions that finally coalesce into a decision or change. They often occur when the discomfort of remaining the same exceeds the fear of change. If we desire to develop, improve, and grow internally, we must act and think differently, which can be immensely challenging. For me, it's easier to change my physical appearance than to alter my mindset, but I relish the process of self-improvement and witnessing my mental growth, which reflects in all areas of my life.
I firmly believe that everything happening in our lives depends solely on us. We are the architects of our lives, shaping our futures and our present. What we have and what we build are entirely determined by our choices, decisions, and desires.
For me, this diary is a testament to that journey, and I will continue it for as long as I live.
Photo taken with Canon 500D
Manipulations and Animation done in Photoshop, After Effect
London, UK 2024
